So, it’ s been awhile since my last post. I’ve been mulling things over that have really come to a head for me in just this last day, week, month … the timing is irrelevant. What’s relevant is that this confluence of events has come together to reveal something to me. Being an extreme extrovert (if you know anything about the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, I’m an OFF THE SCALE Extrovert), I need to put my ideas and thoughts out the world in order to organize them for myself. Extroverted, in this sense, doesn’t mean that I talk all the time (which I *ahem* am guilty of, but that’s for another time). In this context, it means that I need to have a sort of verbal diarrhea to figure things out. And you, lucky reader? You get to hold my hair back as I get this all out. In the process you’ll get to see how I put it all together, though, which may prove to be amusing. 😉
At any rate, among many other things, the Universe brought me this within the last few weeks:
- An in-depth conversation with my pastor about all things spiritual and mundane
- Feedback from some friends about my “strengths” for a class I’m taking (it’s on Asset Based Thinking … but that’s another topic for another time)
- A conference call with some AMAZING coaches (for the class referred to above)
- Some serious introspection
- The events at the Boston Marathon
There’s one single strand that ties all these things together for me.
The common denominator? FAITH.
When you read the word “faith” what does that conjure in you? Tell me where I’m wrong, but I believe that a lot of people have negative connotations about faith because they equate the term with a poor religious experience. A time when someone else was telling them WHAT to believe … or a time when their own beliefs were tested and found wanting by others. What’s interesting is that is only a smallish “form” of faith.
Does your opinion change knowing that only definitions #3 and #5 speak about religion as we know it? What about if you took the time to examine in your life a time when you DID have faith? And by that I mean, just a simple KNOWING that everything would be ok. A simple CONFIDENCE in the unseen.
When I look at my life through that lens, I have ALWAYS had faith. Different names for it have been used to describe me or my actions over time … confident, self-assured, “following my heart” … but none of those words ever really resonated with ME. They just weren’t the words I would use to describe myself. I always chalked those thoughts up to other people seeing me in a way I didn’t see myself — or to my own self-doubt or my desire to feel humble. Confident, self-assured? Sometimes … but those words just felt like labels for something much deeper, much more complicated. So, I never really embraced it.
Now, the Universe conspires to bring me the list of events above. And more, of course, that I’m sure I haven’t even really grokked yet. But the result is the same. It feels sudden to me (although I’m quite sure it is NOT sudden), but here I am at this cross roads where I can either embrace my faith or continue to ignore it.
So, I’m going to try something on for size. I’m going to make a statement that just came to me as I was typing this (yes, I really do operate that way … I DO NOT know what I’m going to write when I sit here in front of my computer. I just let it spill out and edit it later … you’re seeing my extrovert showing .. but I digress).
Ok, here goes: (I’m a little shaky and scared and curious about this … which means it’s the right thing to do …)
I AM A FAITH HEALER.
ACK! Looking at that phrase makes me feel a little sick. But I’m quite sure that’s just my inner mean girl trying to knock me down. I know that because at the same time I feel this weird sense of release. And here is where you get to watch my faith in action. Even though I’m not sure what that statement means:
I’m deciding to embrace it fully and completely. What does that mean to me? What does that DO to me?
- Well, it lets me know I’m not alone. Because I believe that I won’t be.
- It lets me know that things will be ok, no matter how bad they are or how bad they get. Because things WILL be ok.
- It lets me believe that the path I take is the right one, no matter how rocky. Because it is the path I am meant to take – whether I understand why or not. At the end of the day, my understanding isn’t required because my faith drives me on, past any horror, fright, or uncertainty. I’ll just, as the extremely wise Joe Dirt said, “Keep on Keepin’ On.”
And even bigger than that?! I want others to HAVE FAITH. I want to spread this beautiful faith that I see inside me. I want to reintroduce people to the idea that they have faith…that they ARE faith. BEcause I believe that we all have it inside, we just let circumstances and life and others throw a veil over our faith.
I’m still working on the details … and I’m sure I’ll be working on those the rest of my life. But I’m declaring this because I believe that it’s my message, it’s my purpose, it’s my way. (Boy, that feels GOOD to say that … to release that upon the world). I believe that I can help people heal the faith in their lives … from their own self-assurance to their beliefs in God, the Universe, a Higher Plane or little green men. WHAT you have faith in is irrelevant. That you HAVE faith is what’s relevant.
Keep the FAITH my friends. Because it is the only way we can truly love ourselves as we are meant to be loved. And if you doubt … call me. We’ll talk. 🙂